| How
to Get Your Ex-Boyfriend Back
- By using these basic, down-to-earth
strategies, anyone can get an ex-boyfriend back and turn a broken relationship
back into a loving, lasting one - or make their current relationships deeper
and more fulfilling.
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How to Handle a Breakup: 10 Breakup Must-Do's
by Tigress Luv,
The Breakup Guru
10 Breakup
Must-Do's
1. Be Realistic
Don't over-exaggerate your ex's good
points and under-acknowledge their bad. Do not put your ex on a
pedestal!
The funny thing about being 'dumped'
is that we unconsciously build up our ex's worth in our minds. We start to
make them into better beings than they really are, erroneously making them
to be more powerful and 'needed' influences in our lives. Unfortunately,
while we are building them up to Higher Power status in our minds, they are
ripping our worth to shreds in order to find the strength to leave us.
2. Accept It
Accept that the breakup did occur and
that the relationship is over. By refusing to accept this you are only
lengthening the grief process. You cannot keep a relationship alive in your
'head' by denying the breakup occurred, or by thinking about the relationship
and rehashing things over and over. Whether you accept it or not the facts
still remain: You have broken up. The relationship is over. And you will
be okay. I promise you!
3. Put 'You' First
If you don't find value in you, who
will? Pamper and love yourself first and foremost. This is not the time to
turn your back on you, but rather a time to embrace you. God made your arms
just long enough to embrace yourself. Try it. No one is looking! Go ahead
and put your arms around you and give yourself a huge, cradling hug! Of all
the people in your life, you are the only one that will never abandon
you.
4. Write Your Thoughts
Down
Start your own personal journal about
your journey from your heartbreak to 'better-than-ever'. I know one man who
kept a record of his breakup by posting on the Lifted Hearts break up board
at http://liftedhearts.com, starting
from his devastating beginning days, to his healed and in love again days,
and then turned them into an awesome book of self-discovery and hope. You
can find a great source made specifically for journaling through your breakup
with the book, My Breakup Keepsake, found at
http://mybreakupkeepsake.com.
5. Forgive Him or Her
Find forgiveness for your ex - and
for yourself. It is impossible to heal without forgiveness. Understand
that your ex isn't looking to hurt you, but rather looking to find his or
her own happiness.
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6. Accept That You Love
Them
Recognize that you cannot will yourself
to not love someone. You loved your ex, and perhaps you always will. Quit
beating yourself up over the fact and quit trying to find the magic bullet
that will slay your love. It's okay to love someone that you are not with,
and may never be with, but it's not okay to try to fall out of love
with someone.
7. Make a Plan
Get a goal and implement it. Plan out
your new goal and start with step one, not finishing until you've accomplished
the final step. This goal could be to write a book, grow a garden, change
careers, go back to school, or lose twenty pounds…having a goal gives
you something to focus on and work towards. It keeps you from dwelling on
what was and keeps you avidly looking forward to what 'will' be.
8. Change It Up
Get rid of the same-ol'-same! Alter
your routine, rearrange your home, or remodel a room. Get a new hairdo, buy
a new car, volunteer at a local charity…. anything that changes your
typical lifestyle can be most rewarding during a breakup. Sometimes the old
and the 'familiar' can be devastatingly sad when going through the transition
from two to one, so change it up!
9. Keep Yourself Clean - and You
Know What I Mean!
This is not the time to turn to alcohol,
drugs, or one-nights stands in a feeble attempt to kill your pain. It only
adds to your problems and can end up being a permanent reminder to a temporary
situation. Even simple things such as energy drinks or too much caffeine
can cause anxiety or escalate out-of-hand emotions to full-blown panic attacks
- which are a very common occurrence during a breakup. Learn to cope with
out-of-hand emotions by spirituality, soothing music, sipping tea, taking
a 'time-out', reading a book, or - my favorite - walking! I walked
myself into the sexiest legs and prettiest tan during my breakup. What an
added bonus that was!
10. Date Again
Don't worry about all the advice you
hear about waiting to date again. Most of it's bunk. Dating again gets you
out of the house, where breakup depression can fester and turn into something
far worse. Dating again always restores a shattered ego, which is a very
common by-product of a breakup. Dating again may also show you that there
are millions of other people out there that can be as wonderful as your ex,
or perhaps even more wonderful! If you open your heart back up and let new
people in you will feel better.
By Tigress Luv, the Breakup Guru
Tigress Luv , the Breakup Guru, is the author
of How to Get Over a Breakup, an instantly
available online webBook and website, or ebook download, designed to help
you understand and heal from a broken heart, and How
to STOP a Breakup, also an instantly available webBook and website,
or downloadable ebook, designed to help you STOP or reverse your breakup
and get your ex back. Both are available on this site and are free when you
join our community. |
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FOR
THE WOMEN WE HAVE THE ZODIAC MAN!
This is a source of great advice for winning the heart of, or
winning back the heart of, any man of the Zodiac.
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